


When You Gonna Learn

by earthlostgirl



Category: Cowboy Bebop (Anime)
Genre: Canon-Typical Violence, Drunkenness, F/M, Hangover, I Don't Even Know, Idiots in Love, Internal Monologue, Love, Multiple Pairings, Sad Ending, Smoking, tag hell
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-26
Updated: 2021-01-25
Packaged: 2021-03-02 17:33:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 8,379
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24390622
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/earthlostgirl/pseuds/earthlostgirl
Summary: A set of stories about our favorite bounty hunters. Humor, love and a little drama. The daily life of a group of charming idiots
Relationships: Spike Spiegel/Faye Valentine
Comments: 9
Kudos: 26





	1. The Real Folk Blues/Fate

Fate has a hell of a sense of humor, of all the people who could have delivered a message from Julia, it had to be Faye.

Faye, who had disappeared without saying a word, who had slept hugging me after the whole fake cult thing, whispering with a body or without one, the pain doesn't go away. Who had looked at me like I was the biggest bastard in the whole universe when she said that Julia was waiting for me.

...

In the cemetery with a rose in my hand I see her appear, in all her glory and in pursuit of the drama she points her gun at me.

I was angry, I was four years late and on top of that she was asking why I loved her. What kind of question is that? What do you want to tell me Jules?

To be honest, yes, I loved her but I also hated her and I have to make a huge effort in order to avoid crying when she hugs me. How much I missed holding her in my arms. And smelling her hair. And feeling the tickle in my cheeks.

Now she was asking me to run away together. Now? Now that it didn't make sense anymore, that everything was lost.

She never let me drive her car before, must be the guilt or so I want to believe. I can't stop looking at her, she is even prettier than I remembered and a part of me feels that everything has gone back to what it was meant to be. Me and her in a car, free at last. But there was always a part of me that didn't trust her, the part that screamed in my head every night, the part that knew she was sleeping with Vicious. And right now it has a red light on.

She puts her hand on my thigh and pulls her hair away from her face, looks at me from the blue well of her eyes and looks again at the horizon to speak

"you know, I didn't think she was gonna give you the message."

"You don't know her at all."

Julia smiles with that wonderful smile of hers that has a hint of evil and smugness, the smile that tells me that it doesn't matter what I want to keep that she knows. She sighs and slides her hand down my leg, repeats my name and smiles again. Yet I am incapable of smiling back. I still resent the abandonment, but I want to stop the car and hug her and not stop kissing her until the end of the world.

...

And the end of the world comes, with fucking pigeons rising.

...

I know exactly how cruel it is to be abandoned without explanation, I also know that I am unable to give a decent explanation so I say goodbye to Jet as well as I can, thanking him for four years of company, food and shelter and sincere friendship. Or at least that was my intention.

Saying goodbye to Faye is more... complicated, because I want to kiss her, I want her to stop me, I want to tell her... everything, I want her to ask me not to leave, I want to take her with me and in the end nothing... the only thing I get is to make her cry and leave feeling like the biggest asshole in the kingdom, but if she doesn't shoot me, if I don't stop, it's because we knew I had to leave.

I'm sorry, romany.

...

Shit.

It's over.

Julia is dead and I will never forget her. My doom, my life, my angel, my dream. I don't think I've been aware of it until now, she's dead, fuck fate, fuck it, meet her again and lose her in less than twenty-four hours. It's so absurd that I would laugh if it didn't hurt. It hurts like my fucking heart has been ripped out.

It's over.

I walk down the stairs, leaving the last of my demons behind.

It's over.

Bang.


	2. Cigarrete

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A shared cigarette (after the movie).

The rain had stopped, and people were back on the streets enjoying Halloween. The ride seemed eternal, the elevator was rattling, and from her position she could see how the lights reflected on the wet streets. As soon as the elevator doors opened, she saw Spike leaning against one of the iron columns of the tower, his eyes closed and soaking wet. Beside him, Vincent lay motionless on the floor, a short-haired woman hugging him in tears of grief. The girl was so abstracted that she didn't notice her presence.

"You are late, Valentine" he raised his head when he heard her approach, his face was crushed and he was bleeding everywhere.

Faye rolled up her eyes and bit her lips in an effort not to slap him.

"You're disgusting, Spike," she said in a sigh, squatting down in front of him and opening her jacket so she could examine his wounds. " Damn, what a mess... You're not going to change, are you?"

"I'm too old for that," he smiled when she closed her jacket with a disgusted face.

"Is he dead?" she asked, getting up and looking at the immobile body of the man who had confined her for two days.

Spike nodded without looking at Vincent but she was unable to shift her eyes off him.

She was still afraid, it was hard to accept but she was terrified of him and had hated him for making her feel vulnerable and helpless. But at that moment she was unable to feel anything but compassion for that woman.

"Come on, cowboy, I have to take you home so Jet can fix you. Or do you plan to stay here forever?" She held out her hand to help him get up.

"Can we wait a little while? I'm really tired..."he took the crumpled cigarette packet out of his pocket and showed it to her.

"Do you have a cigarette for me? Mine are wet."

"I only have one left," she said, waving the pack in front of his eyes as she sat down next to him.

Spike smiled, resting his head against the wall, watching as she lit the cigarette and took a long puff.

"Have you lost your top along the way?" He asked, pulling at her sleeve as Faye handed him her cigarette.

"Something like that..." she answered laconically, she put her hands around her neck to cover herself, almost involuntarily and she looked at Vincent's body briefly.

Spike followed her gaze with attention and snorted in frustration, returning the cigarette.

"Did he hurt you?"

"Let's just say he shared the antidote with me."

"Are you okay?"

" I don't know " she answered with a sad smile. " I've had better days."

" I'm sorry."

" Why? "

"Cause of how dumb we men are"

Faye laughed softly and he looked at her full of curiosity.

"What's wrong?"

"I think that's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me."

"Really? Then you should change companies."

Spike closed his eyes and rested his head on Faye's shoulder. "Do you mind? I'll just be a moment," he whispered as he let out a sore groan as he tried to find a comfortable position.

"No," she replied, using the same tone of voice as him and trying to settle into the wall without disturbing him. "I'll call Jet to come and get us."

But Spike couldn't hear her anymore, he was either asleep or had passed out, it didn't matter, his breathing was heavy and he would occasionally let out a painful grunt. Faye closed her eyes too, for the first time in days she felt safe and cursed herself for it. She was resting, not very comfortable, until she heard some footsteps approaching. The short-haired woman stood in front of her, her face full of sorrow and her eyes shining red. She studied her for a moment, making her feel uncomfortable, she had that attitude that only the military has, and she had never gotten along with authority.

" Were you with Vincent? " she asked in a whisper, Faye looked at her in disbelief. " No, don't get me wrong... I overheard you... I'm so sorry."

" Why? It's not your fault, you can't take on other people's responsibilities."

"Vincent wasn't a bad man if I' d done something, if I' d looked for him... none of this would have happened, I could have saved him...

" It's still not your fault. Some people can't be saved ." she was realizing that, even if you try your best, it's not in your power. "He was a different man to you than he was to me, just remember how good he was."

" I'm sorry," the woman looked abroad in shame and her eyes filled with tears again.

" Stop apologizing." Faye smiled and Spike grunted something incomprehensible in his sleep.

"Is Spike gonna be okay?" she asked, smiling back at her.

" This idiot? Yes, don't worry, I don't know what he's made of, but soon he'll be pissing everybody off."

" Bitch..." he mumbled.

" There," she said, hitting him on the forehead, to which Spike responded with a wince.

" I'm going to take Vincent. I'm sorry you can't collect the reward."

Electra walked away from them and effortlessly carried Vincent's lifeless body to the elevator. She felt the urgent need to smoke again, so she carefully took Spike's pack and wiped one of the cigarettes with her lighter. She needed to feel the smoke in her lungs, the bitter taste of nicotine in her mouth. Forget and breathe, because it was over.

"Have you seen the yellow butterflies?" Sleepy Spike asked, waking her from her reverie.

"Yes..."

"Did they really exist?"

"I don't know."

" Valentine?"

"What do you want, Spike?"

"Take me home."


	3. " The Hangover(on Mars Las Vegas)"

Before opening his eyes the pounding of the blood in his temples became excruciating. The light was disturbing, almost painful. Even the sound of the outside, the cars, the passers-by, plunged him into a hell of pain. Hello hangover, one of the worst of his life and he had had many.

So he decided to open his eyes and face reality.

There was a naked woman by his side, a stranger with her back to him. He couldn't remember anything, not her name, not what they had done, no matter how obvious it was, not how he had met her. He raised his head to look around, one of the beds was empty and Jet was snoring on a nearby couch. He prayed to all the known gods that they had done nothing in front of him.

The rest of the room was a bloody mess, his clothes, along with the girl's, were scattered all over the place, there were half-drunk bottles and on a table an ashtray full of cigarette butts and food scraps.

The room was huge, a bloody suite that would have cost a good deal of wolong. Money he didn't know he had otherwise. A night to remember, even though he didn't remember anything at all.

  
He just decided to seek forgiveness from his friend by taking him to the casino colony and enjoying a guys' night together. Spending the last bounty money and forgetting about everything together, just like in the old days, as if they were just two normal men, without all the crap that had happened to them in the last few months, even though most of it was his fault, all of it really, it wasn't the time to split the blame, anyway all that he wanted was a little disconnection.

Now, they had done it, they had had such a good time, and they drank themselves out of control. Too much. To the point where it was a huge gap in his memory.

And now he was standing next to a girl, blonde to be exact. She turned over in bed, she was a beautiful Asian-looking girl. She opened her eyes wide and got out of bed, covering herself with the sheets. Her face was red and she probably had a hangover similar to his. The make-up smudged her pretty face and from her expression she seemed to have no idea how she had ended up with him in a hotel bed.

" Hi," he smiled at the girl who was rushing to get her clothes on the floor.

"Yes, hello... uh... good morning...," she smiled hastily, as she finished dressing, she left the room saying goodbye with a "I'll call you someday Stan".

The sound of the door slamming woke up Jet who grunted on the couch and covered his head with the pillow again.

"Shoot me," Jet begged from where he was.

He stood up, was naked and stretched his stiff body, the headache was a burden and his stomach was screaming for release somewhere.

"Damn it, Spike, put your clothes on, I'm too hung-over to see you naked," Jet covered his face with his suit jacket, which he was using as a blanket. "I don't need anything to turn my stomach anymore."

He went into the shower trying not to throw up all the alcohol he had in his body. He turned on the cold water just to see if he could wake up or if he could remember something from the previous night, but nothing became clear.

  
He wrapped in a towel, the shower hadn't helped the headache one bit, and he went back into the room. Jet came in as soon as he left, with huge dark circles under his eyes and dragging his feet as he muttered that he was too old for this life.

Once decided they had the most presentable look they could get, they went down to breakfast.

They asked for well-charged coffee and raw eggs to make Spike's famous hangover cure.They couldn't eat anything, just looking at the food, their stomachs, which seemed to have more memory of the night before than they did, threatened to empty themselves in the middle of the dining room.

"Do you remember any of this? " Jet asked, staring at the steaming cup of coffee.

"I remember watching you sing at the karaoke," a flashback of Jet on stage, glass in hand and screaming off-key popped into his retina as he carefully prepared the praire olyster.

"What?" Jet hid his face with his hands ashamed. " That' s not true. "

"Yes, hugging your buddy the bartender," he said, chuckling, remembering his friend making a fool of himself as a devoted audience applauded and sang with him.

"Oh, dear..."

"Yes, there's a folk star inside you."

"Shut up," he grumbled, looking disgustedly at the beverage Spike had just slipped in front of him.

"I woke up with a woman in bed... Could you add anything to that?"

"When I got to the room, I saw your naked ass on the bed and a blonde hair next to your head, but you were both snoring, I also saw you dancing the Lambada with her, or was it another one, it's all a blur..."

"I don't remember how we got there..."

"We won at roulette and started buying shots for everybody, that I remember."

He covered his nose so he could drink that horrible concoction while he saw flashes of him getting on a chair, dancing with two women, while Jet sang a horrible melody in the Karaoke. He had also sung and not just one song. He remembered roulette and winning, and laughing heartily as he drank shots from the blonde's neck and heard Jet off-key on stage. He also remembered moments of exaltation of friendship when he had told Jet that he was his best friend and that he loved him while kissing his cheeks. A spectacle worth seeing, embarrassing and pitiful. In the end, he was grateful that most of the night was a blank.

" We better keep this to ourselves," he finally said, if he wanted Faye to forgive him at some point, telling her that he had spent the night licking tequila off a stranger's neck wasn't going to be much help.

"Yeah, nothing happened here."

They returned to the Bebop hours later, with a full stomach and the best face they could come up with, which was no big deal, but it was the best.

"A great night, I see," Faye said looking up from a magazine, laughing without any hint of shame.

"Shut up, Faye," grumbled Jet as he headed for his room with the clear intention of letting himself die among the bonsai.

She rose without stop laughing and left him alone in the living room without even saying goodbye. He reached for the couch and lay down, wishing he could fall asleep and leave that horrible hangover behind him.


	4. Nowhere man

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Spike is arrogant, he's a hero and a villain, all the lights and shadows of nowhere man

Beatles: Nowhere man

> _He's a real nowhere man_  
>  _Sitting in his nowhere land_  
>  _Making all his nowhere plans for nobody_
> 
> _Doesn't have a point of view_  
>  _Knows not where he's going to_  
>  _Isn't he a bit like you and me?_
> 
> * * *

**Jealous.**

He loved her like crazy; he loved her shapes, her sound, her touch. Her light, her darkness.

He loved being on her, inside her.

He loved the sensation that she aroused in him.

He even felt an undeniable pride when they looked at him when he had her by his side.

But if there was one thing he couldn’t stand, was that no one but him touched her. So when he saw a dude standing there, with his hands on her, he had no choice but fire.

“Did you shoot that poor bastard just because he touched your ship?” Faye asked, staring at him in an inquisitive way.

“Nobody touches my girl,” he declared, looking at her seriously.

“You’re sick, Spike,” she responded as she walked away from him.

* * *

**Rude.**

“What did you do before becoming a bounty hunter?” she inquired, sitting over the desk.

“I was a postman,” he retorted, glancing away from the novel he was reading.

“Really?” Faye asked suspiciously. “And who taught you to shoot?”

“My dad was a duck hunter,” he answered without looking at her with his eyes locked on the book.

“Oh,” she murmured.

Spike stared at her with disdain, and she sighed in indignation.

“You’re lying,” she pushed the book out of his sight and glanced at him angrily.

“It’s none of your business,” he stated, leaving the novel on the table and closing his eyes.

“Fuck you,” she mumbled. “I was bored, I just wanted some conversation.”

“Don’t ask stupid questions,” said Spike. “Talk to the dog.”

Faye got up making more noise than necessary and disappeared from his sight just as she had appeared.

...

“You remind me of someone,” he picked up her say on the other side of the door. “Widney Hagas Matsumoto.”

At first, he thought she was talking to him until he heard Ein yawn.

He didn’t even want to move. That story was pitiful or a figment of a feverish imagination or... or it explained a lot of things.

He heard Faye’s voice crack as she told Ein that her friend had died; he flushed the toilet; he was sure she wasn’t going to let him see her cry.

“Did you hear everything?” he asked with a look of disgust on his face when he saw him coming out of the bathroom.

“Your story needs editing,” he mumbled, wiping his hands on his T-shirt.

At that moment he realized all the sadness in her eyes and wished with all his heart that this shitty story was just a lie.

* * *

**Miserable.**

The stink of blood and gunpowder, bodies all around him, everything looked sepia-colored.

Vicious turned with an evil, triumphant smile.

He was cold and could hardly hear. The smell was becoming stronger. He was stuck, he couldn’t walk. He couldn’t breathe. He felt his heart slowing down. Everything seemed to be growing dark around him.

Vicious’ voice repeating his name was hammering into his skull.

He looked at his hands; they were covered with blood; he was over the dead body of a kid; he felt like puking.

“Spike,” his voice was acidic. “Spike,” seemed to mock him.

He tried to focus his vision but was lost among the mutilated bodies around him. The demons that were calling him to hell were laughing at him.

“Spike…” he couldn’t stand that awful smell anymore.

“Spike…” The bright green of her eyes popped up in front of him, a confused and worried look. The corridor of the Bebop began to appear behind her. The blood, the smells, the voices, all the images of his past that tried to hunt him down, vanished int the air.

He extended his arms and pulled her towards him.

“What are you doing?” Faye tried to say. He held her tightly, breathing hard against her ear. “Are you OK?” she asked gently, hugging him back tenderly.

“Now I do,” he muttered, leaning on her, feeling that he was in control again.

* * *

**Arrogant.**

“The carnival! - shouted Ed with enthusiasm. "Come on, Faye, Faye. I want to go to the fair!”

“Ed, wait,” said Faye as the little girl grabbed her hand and pulled her into the enclosure.

Before Spike started to laugh, she grabbed him by the flap of his jacket and dragged him with them.

“There’s no way I’m going in there alone with her,” she said, looking over her shoulder.

Ed wanted to get on all the rides, she was running around, happy, jumping. Faye looked exhausted just looking at her.

“Gentleman!!!, do you want to surprise your girlfriend?” shouted the carny as they passed the shooting gallery. “Show your skills with the shotgun, give her a stuffed animal. It’s very easy... if you can shoot...”

“What do you say, princess?” He joked "... Do you want one?"

Faye huffed and puffed. Spike smiled with his back to the stall.

“No,” she said in a sharp voice.

“Come on, Faye, can’t you have some fun for once?“ He poked her.

“That one,” she said, pointing to a big rabbit about the size of Ed.

“Well, the biggest one, the lady likes hard things,” said the carny, laughing.

“I like them big,” smiled Faye, looking at him quite cheeky.

Spike smiled back at her and put a money bill on the counter.

“There are 12 targets for 13 shots," said the man who left the shotgun in his hands.

Spike took the rifle and calibrated the weight between his hands, aiming at the center of the target, fired and missed, it was deflected, he heard Faye laughing next to him. He aimed again, calculating the deflection carefully. He breathed calmly and in a relaxed and slightly arrogant posture, he fired again, hitting the bulls-eye.

He laughed like a child when the carny made a surprised exclamation. He fired eleven shots and hit eleven targets. Before going for the last target he turned to wink at Faye. He concentrated again and when he was about to fire the last bullet she shot with her Glock making a huge hole in the stall. He looked at her in confusion for a second and burst out laughing.

“Didn’t you want the bunny?” he asked with a mocking face.

“You were strutting around like a schoolboy,” Faye rolled her eyes and folded her arms.

“Anyway, that's twelve hits... We won, didn't we? - said Spike, pulling the cuddly toy at the bewildered look of the stallholder.“All yours,”

He let go of the huge stuffed animal in her arms and walked past her without turning around. She looked at him in anger, but since he wasn’t watching, she gave to the huge rabbit a brief hug.

“Come on, I want some cotton candy,” said Spike, raising his hand above his head. “Hey, Ed! How are you doing?”

“Wp...Wonderful," she replied, dancing around him, "I've been on the roller coaster three times in a row." 

“Here, Ed,” said Faye, giving the teddy to the little girl.

“For me? Oooh,” she yelled, hugging the doll and dancing with it." Thank you, Faye-Faye".

* * *

**Hero.**

She saw him fall down the stairwell. She didn't understand why the fuck he went up on the roof. But the floor of the fire escape gave way under his weight and he fell into the void.

She screamed her name in terror, jumped out of the ship, and ran towards him.

Her heart stopped for a second as she saw him on the floor, sitting there, without reacting or moving.

He saw his shoulders move and managed to breathe again.

“Take a look,” he said, pointing to his lap as she approached him.

“Isn’t this some kind of trick to show me your penis?” she asked angrily.

“Do you think I am twelve years old?” he asked irritably.

“Sometimes,” she muttered.

“ Fuck, Look! ” Spike grumbled, pointing again.

She bent over him and saw a small, black, furry kitten on his lap. She looked at him incredulously and he looked back at her with a smile.

“Did you nearly break your head for a fucking cat?” She kicked his foot with the tip of her boot. “Are you an idiot or what is wrong with you?.”

“It looks like you,” he replied raising the kitten that looked at her with huge green eyes. “It has your eyes.”

“You are definitely an idiot,” she said, holding the little animal in her hands. “Did you hurt yourself, hero?”

Spike stood up shaking his clothes and shook his head as he examined himself looking for injuries.

“What are we going to do with him?" she asked almost in a whisper, hiding the animal in the folds of her shirt.

Spike smiled as he watched her walk away from him toward her ship.

* * *

**Idiot.**

Finally, her workday was over. She dialed her friend’s number on the phone.

“Rebecca?” she said when she picked up the phone. “All men are idiots, you know that, don’t you?”

“What happened?” she asked, sighing on the other side of the line.

“I was working, right? And in front of me, there was a guy, gorgeous. He was leaning against the wall with his hands in his pockets. He had weird hair, a kind of greenish afro. His posture was listless, but he seemed to say, I’m the coolest guy in the whole solar system.”

“What's your point, Ann?”

“Listen to me... The guy in question, he was staring at me, like he was thinking something really important. His eyes were brown, but his gaze was very intense. It made my legs shake. After half an hour he came to me, I thought he was coming to kill me or propose. He smiled, and for God’s sake, believe me, at that moment I wished he would make love to me right there, he had the most charming smile I have ever seen. He bought a packet of sugared almonds and went back to the wall. He leaned there with his eyes closed, smoking.”

Her friend laughed on the other end of the phone. “Is that why he’s an idiot? Because he meditated for over half an hour about buying you some almonds?”

“No... listen, after a few minutes a girl appeared, cute as a button, but I don’t know what the hell she was wearing. Very tacky. She came up to him and they started talking. They looked angry. It was kind of fight - very subtle flirting... you know what I mean. I heard her say that she smelled of candy; she turned around and when she saw the stall she smiled and said something to him that he ignored totally. The girl, who was much prettier up close than I had thought, bought a small packet of almonds and went out after the boy who didn’t bother to wait for her. After another little fight-and-flit, she offered him an almond, and he told her he was allergic to nuts.”

“Had he bought the almonds for her?”

“I don’t know, because when she wasn’t looking, he threw away the package he had bought earlier.”

“What?” Her friend laughed on the other end of the phone. “ What an idiot.”

“What I was saying... all men are idiots.”

* * *

**Villain**

He had never seen her so beautiful and yet there was nothing special about that day. Nothing at all. She was merely lying on his lap, naked, bangs falling over her eyes. And she was smiling. Looking at him, seeing something he was incapable to see when he looked in the mirror. 

She caressed his hair, with a tenderness that left him breathless, her legs crossed behind him. He lowered his hands behind her back and rested his head on her shoulder. He breathed softly and gave her a little kiss. 

He hugged her. She couldn’t escape from him, he held her prisoner between his legs, he ran his hand through her hair. He approached her ear slowly. 

“Julia “ 

She sighed and brusquely stepped away from him, he looked at her seriously, avoiding the urge to burst into tears as he saw the pain reflected in those fucking green eyes that drove him crazy. 

Eyes that filled with tears, but shed none. She turned away from him without saying a word. 

He would rather be a villain than let her break his heart.

* * *

> _Nowhere Man, please listen_  
>  _You don't know what you're missing_  
>  _Nowhere Man, the world is at your command_
> 
> _He's as blind as he can be_  
>  _Just sees what he wants to see_  
>  _Nowhere Man can you see me at all?_


	5. Drunken hearted boy

Well, yes, people I am a poor, drunken hearted boy.

Well, yeah, people I am a poor, drunken hearted boy.

I have a whole ocean of trouble,

And just a little, half pint of joy.

I drink because I'm worried, I don't drink because I'm dry.

I know if I keep on drinkin, I'm liable to drink away my life.

But that's alright.

**Drunken hearted boy- The Allman bothers**

**Drunken hearted boy**

He went down the stairs in pairs, looking around. He stood in front of the table and placed the arms on his hips.  
  
"Jet? Jet! " Spike yelled, "Something's broken on the swordfish. It's not working.  
  
"He's not here, he has a date," revealed Faye, walking through the door.  
  
"A date? With a woman? " he asked, baffled.  
  
"I guess, or a man, I didn't ask," she joked. "I don't think he'll be back tonight."  
  
Spike threw himself on the couch, bored. He had no spaceship and couldn't get out of the Bebop that was sailing through space on its way to Mars.  
  
"I'm going to mine too," Faye said without giving it much thought.  
  
"A date?" he asked curiously.  
  
"Yes," she casually replied while tucking the key to the Red Tail into a huge brown leather bag.  
  
He looked at her closely; she was wearing a pair of worn-out jeans and a huge black wool sweater that left one of her shoulders uncovered. She waved goodbye to him and disappeared out the door.  
  
**...**   
  
  
Boredom had headed him to drink, sitting on the couch. Pouring himself one drink after another and smoking non-stop. He was a waste. He entertained himself by singing an old song in a language he didn't understand and which he didn't recall learning. Something about its sad melody was beautiful to him. He had been like that for hours, just letting time go by. He drank directly from the bottle, which was quite pathetic, although there was no one there to tell him. The door opened, and he saw her coming down the stairs. With her purse on her shoulder, drinking some kind of greenish juice through a straw.  
  
Faye looked at him in disbelief and turned to glance at the clock.  
  
"Have you been drinking since I left?" she asked in surprise as she made her way down the stairs.  
  
"Maybe..." he said with a triumphant smile and dragging his words. "Your date is over?"  
  
"Yes," she replied almost in a sigh, leaving the drink on the table.  
  
"And...?" he asked full of curiosity; it was soon. She hadn't been gone long.  
  
"Very good, better than I thought," she said with a smile.  
  
Spike felt his stomach turn. It bothered him to see her smile like that. It bothered him that she had enjoyed it. He looked at her with half-closed eyes, and she seemed to notice and grimaced.  
  
She sat down next to him, staring at him, in disbelief, smiling wide.  
  
"Did you drink it all?" Faye asked, shaking the bottle in his face.  
  
"No... Yes," he said, taking it out of her hands. "I was bored, without a ship, alone..." He sounded melodramatic, but he didn't care. It was the alcohol talking, not him.  
  
"I don't know how you're still standing, Spike," she sighed, drinking from the bottle she had taken back and glanced out of the corner of her eye.  
  
"Because I am a man," he said resolutely.  
  
Faye laughed, and he looked at her with a scowl. He was very drunk, more than usual. He wasn't sure if he had all his senses with him.  
  
"I would like to kiss you" Spike looked at her in a serious way.  
  
Kiss her or touch her or just stare at her all night long. Anything was good for him at that moment. He didn't trust what he was going to say, he felt he couldn't control his impulses.  
  
"As if you ever needed permission for that," she said, running her hand over his shoulder.  
  
He took her face and kissed her carefully. She looked at him with a sweet smile on her lips. He felt annoyed, some jerk made her smile. She smiled calmly, peacefully. Did she smile like that after she had been with him? He let himself fall onto her, resting his head on her shoulders.  
  
"Let's go to bed," he muttered.  
  
"To bed?" Faye asked, trying to conceal a smile.  
  
"What?" he asked outraged. "We've never made it in a bed before. It would be nice if for once we behaved like people, not like animals in heat.  
  
"What?" Faye burst out laughing. "Oh Spike, you're so drunk..."   
  
He kissed her again. Slipping his hands under her sweater. Looking for a way to unbutton her bra.  
  
"You taste like kiwis. I love kiwi" he couldn't help himself, a lot of nonsense was coming out of his mouth.  
  
Faye looked at him somewhere between skeptical and funny, holding back the desire to laugh , he was making a fool of himself in front of her, she would probably be blackmailing him a month after this.   
  
Spike stood up wobbly, he was bloody drunk, rested on her to walk , babbling nonsense.  Faye ran an arm around his waist. She seemed to be enjoying seeing him in that pitiful state.  
  
When they moved into her room, Faye sat quietly on the bed, leaning against the wall. Spike clumsily took off his jacket and shoes and after an almost superhuman effort, he managed to remove his pants.  
  
  
"If you only knew how beautiful you are when you smile," he whispered, carefully approaching her, crawling on the bed.  
  
He placed his arms around her and rested his head on her chest. Murmuring something she couldn't quite hear. He filled his lungs with air and sighed loudly.  
  
"Spike?" she whispered, caressing his back in a gentle way.  
  
"Give me a second," he muttered, hugging her close.  
  
He fell asleep in that position. The alcohol had won the battle this time.  
  
He didn't know how long had he been asleep, Faye was singing as she gently ran her fingers through his hair. She had covered him with a blanket. Her voice was just a whisper.  His back was hurting, the pain was probably going to remain a week, but he didn't want to move, he wanted to keep hearing her sing, feel her fingers playing with his hair. Enjoy the warmth of her, her soft, rhythmic breathing. Her heart beating against his ear. He gasped it was almost an involuntary movement but she realized he was awake and stopped singing.  
  
  
"Good morning, cowboy," she said as he pulled away from her.  
  
He realized he had a terrible hangover and laid down on the bed.  
  
Faye stretched out like a cat, she probably hadn't been in a pleasant position either.  
  
"Please shoot me," Spike pleaded, "Give me mercy."  
  
Faye gave him a gentle pat on the forehead.  
  
"I made a fool of myself yesterday, didn't I?" he asked, the pounding headache barely allowing him to speak.  
  
"Pretty much," she said, lighting a cigarette.  
  
"Shit" Spike covered his eyes with the back of his hand, everything was annoying, the light, the sound of his own voice.  
  
"Although... it was nice... " Faye said almost in a whisper.  
  
He opened his eyes; Faye was looking somewhere in the room, lost in her thoughts.  
  
"Can I sleep here?" he asked, "I don't feel like crawling back to my cabin, I'm fucking pathetic."  
  
"Yes," she replied pensively.  
  
Spike gazed at her silently, she had lost the sparkle that was in her eyes last night.  
  
"Okay, I'll go sleep on the couch," she said after a few seconds, sitting on the edge of the bed.  
  
Faye smiled at him before leaving the room.  
  
"You didn't have to leave," he sighed looking at the ceiling, but it was too late.  
  
  
  
  


* * *


	6. Undercover

He hated undercover missions, hated dressing up and pretending to be someone else. What he liked was straight-up action, a kick in the door, a couple of punches and a hunted down bounty. The rest was a waste of time.

But Jet wasn't in the mood for that, he liked to infiltrate and play all this nonsense. It must be because of his past as a cop. Who knows? Maybe that's why he was so manic.

But there was something good about it, Faye and her pretty dresses.

"Do you see our target?" she asked, bringing the cocktail glass to her lips.

"Nothing has changed since the last time you asked," he replied turning around, so that he could watch the restaurant's entire dining room. "Oh, jeez."

"Have you seen him?" Faye moved in an eager mood, she didn't like to wait either.

"No, Do you see the woman in the white dress? That's Jessica Amber."

On the other side of the fancy restaurant at a secluded table, a couple dined away from the noise.

"Who?" she asked, raising her head with curiosity.

"Jessica Amber, I was so in love with her as a teenager, I saw all of her movies, some as many as five times," he explained. "She was so famous fifteen years ago, don't you know her?"

"Fifteen years ago I was cryogenized," she replied, pouting her lips.

"Yes, I can't help but notice that things forgotten in the fridge cause me a lot of trouble," he joked, winking at her.

"You're so romantic, Spike," she replied with sarcasm, rolling her eyes.

"Hey, you loved me that way," he said, caressing her forearm with his fingertips.

Faye smiled, shaking her head and her bangs fell over her eyes.

"Are you going to tell her something?" she asked maliciously.

"What?" he asked in a funny way. " I used to masturbate thinking about you when I was thirteen?"

"That's right, that's what every woman is dying to hear."

Faye drank from her glass again, without taking her eyes off him, and he felt a terrible desire to kiss her.

"She's looking this way," she suddenly said.

"It will be because you haven't stopped looking at her."

He turned as well, and Jessica presumably upset by the attention, waved to him with a cynical gesture on her face.

"It's your chance," Faye said as she tried to poke him with her nails. "Go get her, tiger."

"Don't you care?" he asked skeptically raising an eyebrow.

"I'm not the jealous type," she replied shrugging her shoulders and resting her cheek in one hand. "Besides, her companion is very attractive, I don't think you have a chance"

"Well, I'm the jealous type," he retorted, turning completely around to face the other table. "It's no big deal.

Faye laughed again, he rested his chin on his hands to look at her better, thinking about taking her dress off, if there was one thing he liked more than seeing her in her beautiful dresses, it was knowing that he would be the one who would take it off.

"She is beautiful. How old is she? She looks great."

"He must be fifty or so."

"I'd love to get to her age like that"

"Technically you're older"

"Technically that's unfair, if you stop a movie for a day it's not like it lasts 24 hours"

"Okay, I'll give you that," he smiled, feeling the urge to kiss her. "I'm sure that even if you're a wrinkled, grumpy old lady you'll still be beautiful. I hope I'll be there to tell you that."

"Oh, that's so easy," she said, bringing the chair closer to him and holding his face while running her hands through his hair. "Don't be an idiot and don't die," she insisted, holding him tightly by his hair. "I'm not afraid that you'll leave with someone else...I'm not afraid that you'll run away..."

"Running away is more your thing," he cut her off, unable to take his eyes off her wine-red lips.

"Running away is more my thing, yes," she whispered, closing her eyes without moving an inch from his mouth.

" Are you asking me for immortality?" he asked and ran his hand around her waist to bring her closer to him.

"I'm asking you not to be a suicidal idiot".

"I don't know what is more difficult," he replied with one of his studied and charming smiles.

"Idiot," she whispered as she kissed the corner of his mouth.

"Yes, but your idiot," he replied smiling as she kissed him.

"Idiots both of you," yelled Jet, knocking on the table which startled them. The reward has been gone for twenty minutes"

"I'm sorry, pal," he replied, "I told you I didn't like this show.

"It's not my fault," Faye muttered, leaning against the back of the chair with red cheeks.

"What have I done to deserve this," Jet grunted, holding his hand to his forehead.


	7. Petite ballerine

I have to admit that at first, I thought she had it all figured out, that her gestures, her movements were part of a role. A trick to distract the poor fools so that she could steal from them, cheat them with cards, or simply get what she wanted. Although I immediately understood that she didn't need it, her cleavage or too short pants were enough to distract anyone from what her hands were doing. Sometimes we are that simple.

At some point in her past, she must have been a dancer. It was enough to see her fight to know that. Her fighting style (which was a mixture of self-defense and a hit and run from the street), the way she sat, walked, moved, had the grace of someone who has spent half her life dancing ballet. One day I noticed that she stood on her toes as she stretched out, and the pieces of the puzzle that Faye Valentine represents to me began to fit together.

I wonder if she remembers. If she had guessed it or if she didn't even think about it. She also liked to dance, even before she remembered she could do it as if it was something in her blood.

One night we were looking for a woman, who was posing as a receptionist in luxury hotels and in that way she could steal from the customers, we were entertaining ourselves in the bar watching a dance class. We didn't have many clues and were there trying our luck. Faye in her black dress, drinking a Martini, was looking at the group dancing in the middle of the floor.

"Do you want to dance?" I asked, approaching her with my empty Scotch glass in the hand.

" When did you learn about Lindy Hop?" she raised one of her eyebrows, in disbelief, and took a little sip from her glass.

"I can try, it doesn't seem difficult," I looked at the floor where people were focusing on following the instructions of the professional dancer. "It's either that or get drunk."

"You don't know what you're talking about," she chuckled, leaving the glass on the counter, but her eyes glowed with enthusiasm.

So I grabbed her hand and since she didn't offer any resistance we went to the dance floor. Faye was attentive to the teacher's instructions, looking at her, and repeating the steps in a perfect way. 

My ego, initially wanting to lead had to surrender to the evidence, my first steps were clumsy. I had no idea and Faye mocked me with no compassion. So I let her guide me, I knew for sure that she danced a lot better than I did.

"Wow, Spike you're so nimble and so bad at this," she said, looking at my feet holding back a laugh.

"Just because I have coordination doesn't mean I have rhythm," I replied in frustration.

She laughed again but took me by the hands and moved me around the floor as she wanted. Faye moved so beautifully that I struggled between looking at her and attending to the instructor. I got to dance decently to her surprise. Right on all the steps, they were teaching us. After all, so many years of Jeet Kune Do must have been good for something.

"Now a difficult step, the one who is guiding the couple has to lift her with an arm and pass her through the back, don't worry if it doesn't come out, it is the hardest step of all, be careful". She and her dance partner did a pirouette in front of the attentive look of all present who laughed nervously at such a demonstration of skill.

"I can't do that," Faye said, letting go of me with sadness. "I can't lift you in my arms."

"I can do it," I offered her my hand and the best of my smiles.

She looked at me hesitantly but seemed to give in, we followed the monitor's instructions, the footsteps, the turn, the throw, and ... she stopped before grabbing her again, bumping into me.

"Trust me, Faye, I'm not going to let you fall," I whispered in her ear and it was one of those rare occasions when I managed to make her blush.

We repeated the step and this time she let herself go and I managed to catch her in my arms. I heard her laugh and put her down again. We continued dancing even though the instructor ended the class and we were exhausted.

As we neared the bar again, she grabbed my face with her hands and kissed me until we were out of breath, devoting a crushing smile to me, full of happiness, with her damn eyes shining like stars in the night.

And then, well... we had a lot of fun.

She never smiled like that again. I fucking miss her so much. I never imagined it would be so hard to miss someone you see every day.

I don't understand why she's so angry anyway, I just wanted to die in her arms.


	8. Workout

* * *

Faye's chest moved up and down from the workout. Sweat made her skin shine.

Her ponytail was undone, and a few strands fell messily into her face.

"You are tired, let's stop," Spike said, knowing it would annoy her.

"That's not true," she replied, breathing heavily as she moved into a defensive position. "Come on cowboy, show me what you got."

"I'd have to take my pants off for that," he joked with a grin.

"Wow, sex jokes, what are you fifteen?" retorted Faye, who twisted her gesture and beckoned him closer with a wave of her hand.

He took a quick step towards her, who nimbly dodged him and stepped aside. She smacked the back of his neck and giggled.

Damn, she was fast. He moved to try and catch her, but she dodged him without much effort. He kicked her leg, bringing her down. Faye hit the ground with her fist in anger and quickly got back up.

Without thinking, she attacked him again. Kicking, punching, with all the force she was capable of.

"I have seen you fight, Spike, you are holding back," she said, throwing a punch at him.

"I'm not..." he replied, moving around her.

"Yes, you do," she retorted, throwing herself at him.

Spike moved quickly, grabbing her fist and putting her arm behind her back.

"Why are you so angry, Valentine? That won't help you," Spike whispered in Faye's ear as he pushed her against the Bebop wall. "

"You're not fighting at 100%," she muttered, trying to break free.

"Why do you want me to fight at 100%?" he said, letting go of her arm to free her.

"My enemies will not hold back," observed Faye remarked, giving him a shove. "Come on, hit me."

"Well, I'd rather hit your enemies ... if I have to, Faye," he replied, dodging another blow.

"Oh, that's is sweet, Spiegel," she replied, pausing and smiling.

Spike took the opportunity to give her a little punch between the legs that knocked her to the ground.

"Don't get distracted, Valentine," he whispered, still smiling as he slumped to the floor.

"You either," she said, rapping his knuckles, which knocked him to the ground as well.

Spike scrambled up to place next to her, and they lay on the floor, trying to catch their breath.

"I'm am holding back because I do not need to use all my energy, that is pretty much the first rule of combat, know your enemy," he explained, turning his face to look at her. "You are fast, but you have no strength."

"Oh, thanks," she muttered in annoyance.

"I'm not trying to insult you, I am just pointing out your strengths, you'd better run that you're good at," Spike smiled and jumped to his feet. "Shall we hit the shower?" he asked, offering her his hand as he winked at her.

"Nice try, Spike," she replied, grabbing his hand and standing up as well.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, I've had a lot of work (and I've been very lazy as well)   
> so I'm back into writing with a little fic.   
> Nothing special, just a little routine.


End file.
